I let down my guard last night,
And doubt crept in.
She was very sneaky about it.
Doubt has a way of working quickly like that, after all.
At first, I didn’t even notice her.
But then.
I felt an all-too-familiar niggle…
And that niggle grew into a sliver.
And that sliver grew into a cloud.
And suddenly,
I was plunged into a dark pool of uncertainty.
Where up was down,
And down was up.
And right suddenly felt very wrong.
I started second guessing myself.
I went back and forth, and back again.
I agonized over decisions made.
And actions taken,
Or not taken…
I worried, and fretted, and stewed.
I shut out, and I shut down.
I wrung my palms,
Paced the room,
And forgot to breathe.
Breathe.
Inhale. Exhale.
In and out.
Fresh thoughts in,
Negative thoughts out.
Center. Logic. Calmness.
The oxygen hit my brain,
And that cloud -
She shrunk back into a sliver,
And she eventually disappeared.
I know that niggle
Will try to creep back in.
So I will wait for her.
And while I do,
I’ll try to remember,
The power of my own breath.